While it is certainly bad enough that the people of Edmonton-Calder elected such a patriarchal, chauvinistic moron, it can be easy to be misled when you are voting on someone who has not served a previous term in office. I seriously hope that this serves as a reminder to everyone, not only in Edmonton-Calder, but in every single riding in this province. Remember what THAT person did, remember what their party did, remember every single thing that they did, and when you have 50 such incidents in 4 years then remember each and every apology that meant nothing. Remember that they are apologizing out of convenience and necessity rather then a realization that what they did was a horrible, horrible thing to do.
I am not referring to the instances where someone does something out of character without realizing the harm and apologizes because they realize what they did HURT. I am only referring to the all to common "convenience apologies." These are obvious when they are apologizing for something that is a part of who they are. They are apologizing, not for what they have done, but because they are part of the absolute scum of the earth, they know it, they just want to continue pretending for a little longer. They are trying to pull the wool over every ones eyes to conceal their true identity.
Doug Elniski is one of these people. He flaunts his male privilege, his chauvinistic attitudes, and his complete total disrespect for anyone who is not male. The fact that he actually spoke in front of a grade 9 graduation ceremony and attempted to spread his monolithic, self serving, patriarchal views is enough to require MUCH MORE then an "Oops, I didn't mean it that way, I'm sorry" Lets look at his past recent posts in public mediums to see what his character actually is, lets see him for who he displays himself to be, then we will examine his comments and the torridness of them with that perspective. I think it is important to keep in mind as we make this journey to understand the perspective from which this speech was given, that in general the face people allow others to see is FAR FAR nicer and more civilized then their true selves.
While I want nothing more then to NOT make this journey, in order to fully acknowledge the depths of depravity that these comments come from, and the EXTREME likelihood of either repetition, or worse, escalation, we must make walk down this path. So without further adu, lets get to business.
On June 13th, Doug Elniski posted on twitter
"bikini car wash 82 129 ave girls look cold (...)"This coming from a man who has been married at LEAST 1 decade (likely 2 or 3 decades), and has THREE daughters!! This is a comment I could imagine a 17 year or, or a 20 year old making. I mean seriously, while the girls in question are obviously baring it for the intent to garner attention, and while I cannot condemn Doug for enjoying the view (although his wife certainly could, and should...), posting about it on a public forum where 387 people are "following" it is on much different level then elbowing your buddy and saying "hey look at that...." This is much closer to honking, driving around the block, leaning out the window, hollering at them, then going and pestering them to get their phone number etc. In my mind, this is near criminal behavior. Coming from a husband, father of 3 women, and an elected public official, this is SO far from "normal" that I would be terrified to have my children be ANYWHERE near him. This is very comparable to Hulk Hogan oiling up his bikini clad daughter's rear end a while back. Just plain disturbing.
Perhaps that was just a mistake, maybe his testosterone was abnormally high that day, maybe he just left Hooters, had feminine beauty on the brain and in an slightly intoxicated state accidentally violated normal behavior. So lets see the "big picture" here, maybe if we see what his other activities for the day were we can appreciate the perspective he was at in that moment...
On June 13th he also posted his speech that he gives to Junior High Students on his blog. So either he thought about Junior High Students and that put him in a leering objectifying women state of mind, or seeing scantily clad women and lusting after them made him think of the speech he gives at Junior High Schools....which ever one it is, it is near criminal and VERY disturbing.
June 13th he was also at the Pride Parade in Edmonton. Lets see if perhaps that influenced Doug Elinski's thought process. Perhaps his other twitter comments could shed some further light into his perspective and help us understand the person who made these comments...
"I am surrounded by bumping and grinding lesbians,"Wait, this doesn't make sense, he sounds like he was participating in an orgy.... or maybe he just assumed that Lesbians were some sex crazed nut jobs that sleep with women not because they don't find men attractive, but because they exist solely to satisfy his erotic fantasies. Wow, he saw lesbians in a parade and correlated that with "bumping and grinding" and seemed to be bragging that he was watching them. Yes, Doug, they like creepy guys that stare at them. They like guys who stare at them who are married and have daughters of their own. They are there to satisfy your every desire. Maybe I can shed some light on this for you Doug, IT IS A PARADE NOT A PORN MOVIE.
So to recap, this is a man who in fairly quick succession, was fantasizing about lesbians who are not attracted to men, he was leering at scantily clad women and broadcasting that to others to come leer at as well, and then he thought about posting his speech that he gives to Junior High Students. Very, Very Sick Individual.
So now that we understand how someone like Doug Eliniski thinks, lets get to the real discussion about the speech his gives to unsuspecting, trusting, Grade 9 girls, (and boys.) This is my MAIN problem with this man. While the other actions are truly sickening, I would need to take action to see them. I would need to WANT to see what people like Doug Eliniski are thinking and saying in order to be affected by it. I seriously hope that I don't need to worry about any young women in grade 9 seeking out the thoughts of a man like that so that is not my concern. My concern is that these comments were made to young women who are just starting or are about to start the wonderful world of exploring their sexuality and starting to define their spot in the world. That these women did not make a choice to seek out his opinion, these women were subjected to that opinion. This is a SERIOUS problem.
"Ladies, always smile when you walk into a room, there is nothing a man wants less than a woman scowling because he thinks he is going to get s--t for something and has no idea what."I'm sorry where does this jackass get off telling young women that they exist to please the men around him??!! Who the fuck cares whether or not a man (or a women for that matter) thinks he is going to get shit for ANYTHING. If they are too stupid or ignorance to know what they've done wrong why should ANYONE care. Why should anyone care if they are so self centered and think so little about those around them that they believe that when someone walks into a room scowling, it is because of them that the person is scowling. I mean get off your high horse. Whatever you do, don't tell them something like this ... "When you see someone walk into a room scowling, go and see if you can cheer them up. Make people smile wherever you go. Everyone likes someone who helps lift them up when they are feeling down." No, can't say that, that might give them the impression that they are important, and that they can make a difference, and that they can have an amazing positive influence on those around them. I guess if Doug Eliniski promoted ideals such as that he would have less women thinking they need to show off their "assets" in order to get attention, and he would have less bikini car washes to leer at, or less fuel for the porn industry to satisfy his lesbian fantasies. No people like him need to keep women down and tell them that they exist for the sheer purpose of keeping men happy. Creep.
Okay, breathe, take a step back, lets remember, perspective is important. I may be taking these comments completely out of context, lets look to other snippets from his speech, perhaps they can show us what he really meant...
"Men are attracted to smiles, so smile, don't give me that 'treated equal' stuff. If you want Equal, it comes in little packages at Starbucks."WHAT!!! You want Equal go to Starbucks!!!, OMFG. Seriously why is this person allowed to be near young women, let along talk to them! I guess my attempt at trying to be fair and look at the broader speech simply showed that my initial impression was correct. An apology does NOT suffice here. How many graduating classes did he give this speech to? How many young women were told explicitly that their purpose was to "Smile" for Men's benefits? How many young women were told to forget about Equality and stick to the sugar packs at the coffee shop when they talked about being Equal. How many young women saw a successful, elected official, whom makes laws, display this horrible attitude. Worst yet, how many young men saw this as their role model. How many of our future law makers were shown that women are there to serve them, and that by treating women like objects, they too can succeed.
This is absolutely appalling that these actions have happened. I am terrified for the youth that were subjected to that. If my children were in that school, I would be screaming from the rooftops. Ed Stelmach has indicated that no formal discipline is being planned at this time. What better way to reinforce the message that these actions are ok, that our Premier agrees with these actions. Silence is the Enemy. Forgetting only lets this episode repeat itself.
Above all else, REMEMBER!!!
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